Pay it forward

Recently, internally I haven’t felt as happy and fulfilled as I usually do and I’m finding it difficult to experience this phase because it reminds me of a time when I didn’t know what happiness was. I feel that I have had an extended period of happiness that has now ended, so I’m trying to keep my head up and realise that this is simply the ebb and flow of life rather than something that is permanent.

I wanted to share this video with you. It shows the effectiveness of paying it forward and how the smallest things can be enough to encourage kindness and spread love to others. We all experience low points and some of us are fortunate to go through the high points also, but by showing a little care to others and occasionally going out of your way for the benefit of others, we can help to reduce the negativity around us.


The importance of gratitude

It’s so common for a vast majority of us to have those occasions where we doubt ourselves, our path, and for some of us, our lives in general. After reading The SecretΒ I learnt about the power of the law of attraction as well as gratitude. These two aspects have become very important in my own journey to positivity and happiness.

Gratitude can be showing appreciation for those around you, yourself, your interests and achievements, even your failures. It’s appreciating everything that you have (the good, the bad and the annoying), whilst showing openness for so much more to come. The problem for most people is appreciating the difficult elements within their lives that may have set them off of track. However, in order to move forward it is really essential to show appreciation for your hardship whilst acknowledging your ability to move forward from it. It took me around 3 years to acknowledge that my hardship actually emitted positivity. This acceptance and gratitude does not happen over night – for me it developed as soon as I was able to heal and start to move forward.

Personally, I became heavily depressed after moving to another country and returning back home without my parents. My lifestyle had shifted, my personality was a shadow of it’s original self and I didn’t even know what happiness was – almost everything was a an act. I’m not sure exactly why this happened, and I was probably in a dark place before I even moved, but France seemed to be the catalyst. However, now I am able to look back on the situation and appreciate what happened to me. There were moments when I didn’t want to be alive and I didn’t know why or how I could feel that way, it consumed my entire thought process. I was told to read The Secret, and it essentially changed my life. Now, I look at the situation as something that I grew from and got through, rather than something that consumed me. It’s also enabled me to be able to empathise and help others who are suffering.

The idea of positive thinking and the law of attraction sounds so floaty and lacking in substance but there are numerous important thinkers reciting this idea of the law of attraction, as well as endless testimonies from people who have read the secret and experienced the same change in their lives, by 1. appreciating what they have and 2. only seeing positive things in their future.

Gratitude can work for the smallest of things, such as ‘I’m thankful because I had the time to have a lovely bath this evening’ to ‘I’m so thankful for having such a supportive group of friends’. The list can be endless but it can work for everyone. For me, I often compare myself to someone who would be worse off than me, whilst encouraging me to remember that others have it worse off and I should be helping them!

Give a try and see how it goes!

Love and Light x

Positive minds VS Negative minds

Recently, I’ve been making such a big effort in my own life to remain positive and keep my loved ones propped up in the same mindset. I often find that showing other people love can enable you to feel so much better about your situation, as it’s such a natural yet necessary feeling to love. However, it’s difficult when you feel faced with a constant influx of negativity.

How do you deal with someone if their negative energy conflicts with you positive energy? This is something that I’ve been struggling with for a while and recently I’ve noticed it more. After coming through the other side of depression, I’m a big believer that you are the master of your own destiny and regardless of what people say around you, your inner strength is what will keep your mind healthy.

I can’t speak for anyone else’s state of mind, but this way of thinking helped me to build a stronger mind and now I maintain this through positive thinking over the smallest things. So, when you’re faced with someone who unknowingly places a brick wall in front of their own opportunity for positivity, it’s incredibly challenging because you simply want to help them. I understand that some people may feel helpless in their situations or may not even be aware of the fact that they’re negative in some way or another, but I do find it upsetting when you feel as if your positivity is compromised. I guess, I’m struggling with the fact that I’m only in control of my own happiness and no one else’s. Controlling eh?

Happiness is the prize

I’m sure there has been a stage in most people’s lives where they have really understood the saying ‘life goes on’. When I was younger, I assumed that it meant ‘pick yourself up, you’ll be ok kid’, but what I understand it to be now is ‘you can mope all you like and that won’t help either, but in the meantime life will continue with or without you, so you may as well be present and pick yourself back up, because no one else is doing it for you’.Β 

I recently returned to university and exam period has kicked in, in full swing. Although I’m surrounded by people that make me laugh and I am back to my own personal, calm space, it still feels as if something is missing or that I am simply feeling numb. The Christmas break has been emotionally challenging for me whilst going through a break-up, dealing with death, studying for exams and all the while coping with anxiety but thankfully waving goodbye to depression. Through positivity I have started to become one of those people who can simply get up and get on with life. Consciously attacking life with a positive, lighthearted attitude can make all the difference to a god-awful day and a pleasant day. However, although this ‘get up and go’ attitude has its benefits, it’s leading me to feel slightly numb to life as I’m occasionally abandoning any time to process these emotions – so I guess I’m doing it now. I’m not sure if this is my body’s way of shutting out emotion so I can get up and survive another day, or if this is simply what it feels like to be healing from something like depression.

Depression to me felt like an extreme emotion, so now that it feels further and further away from me and who I am, no longer hurting me, I’m unfamiliar with this steady emotion that I am experiencing due to it’s lack of extremity. I am appreciative for my steady state of mind, but sometimes I do wonder if I will get back to feeling happy rather than content. Perhaps it’s a lifelong challenge and happiness is the prize?

Change, change, change

Recently, in my life a lot has changed and it’s been a struggle to cope at times but I’m really trying to remember to think positive. A few weeks ago after some guidance from a friend, I decided to buy some crystals to see if their presence could provide me with some good energy. I cleansed them in salt water and now they sit on my window ledge – hopefully providing some happy vibes.

It’s been extremely difficult to stay in a sane state of mind but I think I’m gripping on by the skin of my teeth. The way I see it, at least I’m still hanging, I haven’t fallen quite yet.

Why is it so hard to just be happy and not worry about what’s coming or more importantly what isn’t!

Does anyone have any good tips for keeping a happy state of mind? I could definitely use some help right now!


What makes us love drugs so much?

For my dissertation I’m looking at the re-emerging rave culture alongside its partnership with ‘club drugs’. Exclusively looking at MDMA (A.K.A ecstasy), I want to explore the potential idea that individuals take drugs to relieve social anxieties that they may have.

Now, I know not everyone is socially anxious or necessarily has a motive for drug taking other than ‘it’s fun’, but I do believe there to be a small group of people who take drugs for other, more meaningful reasons.

Although I would call myself socially anxious, I haven’t ever intentionally taken drugs to relieve this anxiousness, it’s always just come as a pleasant side effect. However, I thought recently how often people explain the joy they feel when they have taken MDMA because they can talk to people in social situations, feeling a deep connection for hours on end – which they are not used to feeling as much in normality. This got me to thinking, if we can’t do this normally perhaps people feel relieved that this weight is temporarily lifted from their shoulders when they consume drugs.

In usual day-to-day scenarios, some people don’t feel as though they can talk to certain people about particular topics. However, when they consume a drug like MDMA, they can. There’s something about this that suggests to me that some people are normally uncomfortable in these kind of situations – some may even say anxious.

Studies have already produced results that explain individuals consume drugs as a way of emotional escapism, but I don’t feel as if anyone has discussed social anxietiesΒ in an equal amount of depth.

What do you think?

Have you ever taken drugs as a way to relieve social anxieties?